Contentment
I recently had the opportunity to spend an evening with my friend, John. Although John and I may not see each other for several weeks, we have the ability to quickly move beneath the surface and discuss our lives openly. It is a gift I cherish. At our last meeting, he asked me, “So, Joey, what are you going to do with your life?” It’s a perpetual question we ask each other at our meetings. I have spent decades trying to figure it out. For many years, I lived in the future tense always thinking about what I might become or do someday. I thought about and worked toward jobs I thought I wanted. However, when I arrived at some of those jobs, I found myself dreaming about something else. There is no contentment in that.
My conversation with John brought to mind a couple of different authors I have read recently. Parker Palmer, the Quaker educator, wrote, “Before you tell your life what you intend to do with it, listen for what it intends to do with you.” Similarly, the Trappist Monk, Thomas Merton, wrote, “If our desires reach out for things that have no meaning for the growth of our spirit, if they lose themselves in dreams or passions or illusions, we will be false to ourselves and in the end our lives will proclaim that we have lied to ourselves and to other men and God.” The words of these writers relay a truth I had to learn the hard way.
It’s not easy, however, to listen for what my life intends to do with me. John and I talked about how it is difficult to walk the line between finding contentment with what is in us naturally and the temptation to aggrandize ourselves into larger illusions and dreams. The America I grew up in convinced me I could be anything I wanted to be. That lie rejects the truths that Palmer and Merton propose–that our lives speak for themselves and hold within them what is good and right for us. I must first listen carefully to the way in which God has created me and allow that to direct my present and my future. These are truths I’m learning to live, and I’m finding my life is much more content.
Comments
Share your thoughts...
