Talk Honestly to God
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We show love to God not only by listening to what God has to say to us, but also by talking honestly to God. As in any intimate relationship honest conversation is an absolute must. How can two people, for example, truly love each other if they don’t honestly share their thoughts and feelings, even if those thoughts and feelings are hard for the other person to hear? If we keep our hurt or doubts from those we love, then we can never truly be known and our relationship will always be limited to polite, surface interactions. That is not love.
Several snapshots come to mind when I think about honest conversation with God. I see Elijah beneath the broom tree telling God he wants to die. Later, hiding in a cave Elijah shares his bitterness. “I’ve been zealous for you, God, and look what it’s gotten me. Israel has rejected God, all the prophets are dead, and now they are after me.” (1 Kings, 19).
I see Jonah beneath the vine after Nineveh is spared. He says to God, “I am angry enough to die.” (Jonah 4:9) I see Job with all his blisters and boils shouting at God to show him what he has done wrong. Mostly, however, when I think of this kind of love, I see Jesus in the Garden praying to the Father. “Let this cup pass from me,” he said. Luke tells us he was in anguish with sweat like drops of blood falling to the ground. Later, on the cross, he shouts, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” (Matthew 27:46).
These are all pictures of people with intimate relationships with God. Their intimate love relationship allowed them the privilege and the responsibility to tell God what was in their heart, what they were feeling, and what they feared.
I have had many heart-to-hearts with God–times I thought God didn’t come through like I expected, times I thought God was being quite rude by not answering my prayers, times I felt abandoned by God, times I didn’t want to listen to God. I still remember the first of these as a young man. I felt like God had left me hanging and hadn’t followed through on a bargain I imagined we had made. I escaped into a forest away from all other people and shouted at God until my throat was raw.
I can hear you asking, ”How in the world can this kind of behavior be a demonstration of love for God?” I was definitely angry at God that day, but anger and love are not mutually exclusive. I have often been angry at my children, but have never stopped loving them. On that particular day in the forest, instead of letting God know what was in me, I could have walked away from God. I could have kept my anger inside and built walls of resentment. Instead, I trusted God with my my hurt. I think God prefers I talk (or yell) it out. I think God wants us to share what is within us no matter how ugly.
I believe to tell God of our pain and hurt, even if we think God is to blame, is an act of love. It tells God we want to continue working on this relationship. It tells God we trust him with our pain. To ignore the pain or hide it from God, is an act of secrecy and hypocrisy and can never be an act of love.
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