in the face of the steer
I heard the story yesterday, Lord, of a church in Turkey where every adult member recently received threatening phone calls. If they didn’t renounce Christ and raise their children in Islam, said the caller, they would be killed. How little things have changed since Paul walked those same roads! I can only imagine the fear they must feel for themselves and their families today. Give them courage.
This morning, Jesus, I’m also considering how you must have felt as you descended into Jerusalem to begin what we call Holy Week. You knew what the week would bring. Did you have no fear? When you prayed in the Garden before they came to take you, did you have no fear?
I ask these questions because I know that I have fear in my life and I want you to tell me it’s okay to be afraid. I want you to tell me that my faith is not weak if I experience fear. I’m afraid of moving forward sometimes, afraid of taking a chance. I’m afraid to take a stand or to speak what needs to be said. I’m afraid to pursue the gifts you’ve placed within me.
So, too often, Lord, I stand facing the steer. Frozen. I’m afraid I will be gored by the horns of my opposition or the hurtful words of others or the shame of failure. I’m afraid I will be trampled and hurt beneath the feet of those who disagree or want to criticize. Sometimes I convince myself that I shouldn’t move forward if a steer stands in the way. I tell myself that is God’s way of telling me “no.” Truthfully, it is nothing more than an excuse to allow my fear to reign.
In the Garden, Jesus, you faced the cross, yet you pressed on saying, “Not my will by yours.” Paul faced imprisonment and beatings, yet he was not detoured from his purpose. Christians around the world who face persecution have continued to pursue their faith despite the consequences. I believe you and saints throughout the ages have experienced fear, Lord. You understand what I feel today. Yet now I see that faith is not allowing the fear to reign. Faith is pursuing the will of God in the midst of fear. Teach me today to walk in faith even in the face of the steer. Amen.
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